Errors stacked on errors...

I was roughly 16 when the idea was presented to me.  An explanation of nature that had been popular for centuries.  Many of the great minds thought it an adequate explanation including Aristotle and continued to have proponents even after its tenants had been disproven.

The presentation resonated poorly with me.  I felt that its discussion was not the bailiwick of a Biology class.  It, like the ideas of humors and ether, were now the possession of history.  Although the idea had been believed, that in no way gave it merit.

The idea was labeled "spontaneous generation".  Treatises and even experiments were conducted to validate the belief.  In truth, it stood up to some scrutiny.  For those of you not aware, the theory was disproven by Louis Pasteur in several experiments and some rather brilliant correspondence between 1859 and 1862.  As a result of these experiments, you can, if you wish, view broth than has been sterile since before the U.S. civil war.

The tale taught me much.  I learned what my own beliefs were regarding science and its instruction.  I learned that everything can be put into question.  I learned that the very idea of higher forms of life simply jumping into being was anathema to me.

While writing this, I have again been made aware of how little time we've had.  The mystical, unexplainable world was not really questioned until the 19th century.  Germ theory and atomic theory are new.  All of our knowledge of the subatomic was gained in the last 100 years.  Our entire concept of the universe was changed a dozen times during the 19th century and again in the 20th century.

Assuming that our current model of the universe is correct would be foolish.  We have learned much, but we already know there are problems with the conventional view of the universe and problems with many of the theories thus far proposed.  Experiments need to be devised and when they are, the surviving theories will become the conventional view and the cycle will repeat.

For now, let us stop boring our children with ancient theories that have no validity.  Such things are now anecdotes of history.  Teach them what we "know" and allow them to take the next step.

We are all prejudiced

I have become a little infuriated recently be some misconceptions. 

Let me state that I am a heterosexual, Caucasian, male.  This may have been obvious.  Whether or not you believe it, that means I got to play the "game of life" on easy mode.

The society we live in has a set of implicit beliefs.  You need not agree with them.  I hope that you do not.  You may even choose to deny their existence if you wish.  However, the subject and a reference to my race and sexuality has probably already caused you certain conceptions to form.

The story that our society tells about me is beneficial to me.  According to the story, I am boring, dependable, out-of-touch, rich, I lack athletic ability, I am married, I am conservative, I cheat on my wife, etc.  This story may not be the story I want to tell, but it has been useful to me.  You may not wish me to be on your pick-up basketball team, but you do wish to employ me.  Is this a horrible situation? Yes.  But pretending that the situation doesn't exist, is not a solution.  Pretending that this misconception does not benefit me; pretending that I am not a member of the privileged group in our society; to basically deny one part of the problem; is insulting to all other groups as well as insulting to me personally.

The terms we use are even indicative of the underlying problem.  We "discriminate".  Our brains separate, categorize, discern.  It was not until after the U.S. Civil War that "discrimination" took on a different meaning than "discriminating".  Is our pattern recognition faulty? Yes. Do we err? Often.  Does it seem to be an inherent process of human consciousness? Yes.

In my particular case, I have grown tired of my ethnic peers denying the opportunities they have had; believing the antiquated Social Darwinism that is still propagated.  The game is not fair.  Anyone who feeds off errant pattern recognition is not on your side.  Anyone who wishes to separate people and to categorize them is degrading them.

We are flawed.  We are also conscious.  We can know that we are flawed.  We can make ourselves better.  The first step is honesty.  It is time we stop hiding behind words.  I have my prejudices.  I can not say how or when they were formed.  I have chosen to recognize them and remove them from my psyche, but some remain and I do not know if I will ever be free of them.

The second step... Well, that involves talking.  Prejudices are shattered in the same way scientific theories are: contrary evidence.  If you get to know me, I'm no longer "a heterosexual, Caucasian, male", I'm Frank.

You pay the co-pay

I could have sworn I wrote this blog long ago, but I did not see any reference to it.  The expression is my mother's.  It references seeking the advice of a mental health professional.  For those lucky enough to have coverage for mental health consultation, there are no real barriers to treatment.  There may be barriers, but they have no substance.

I have had a rather odd relationship with therapy.  Well, I consider it odd.  Therapists vary greatly in their adaptability, specialization, and skill.  The same could be said of many professionals, but the mind doesn't not allow results to be easily measured.  One can not simply rely on recommendations or commercial success in choosing a provider.  I cannot say that all the providers I have interacted with were helpful.

But therapy is not meant to be curative.  It is meant to be therapeutic.  A capable therapist allows their patient to voice their thoughts.  The patient may or may not come to some realization.  The patient may or may not feel relieved to express something.  It is quite possible that you may develop a relationship that allows for such expression outside of a therapeutic environment.  However, emotional investment can quickly become an issue.

I have chosen to avoid therapy more often than not.  The propensity of drug treatment, lack of self-awareness, and misunderstandings regarding mental health caused me to internalize.  I do not regret the result.  I may have become overly-reliant on escapism but I believe I did gain insight.  However, I have turned from escapism and now find that I lack other coping strategies.

And so, I pay the co-pay.  I give voice to my thoughts without ruining someone else's day.  I am glad that this opportunity exists.  Consider it a crutch if you wish, but sometimes using a crutch is the only way to keep moving.