My body is changing. I can feel that. I am more attune to it than ever. It is no longer a fan of alcohol. Variations in diet or sleep patterns become apparent at the gym, some of the effects are positive, some are negative. My lifestyle has become healthier not simply by intent but because I can actually feel the effect bad habits have on me.
But, what about psyches? I have always prided myself on, well, knowledge of self. I was born introspective. I was an introvert well into my twenties. I would not consider myself extroverted, but I now seek out others. I'm still no good at interacting in groups, but I want to be rather than just avoiding it as was my wont in times of old.
Parts of my personality are being given voice. Random silliness has a siren song I was not aware of. I didn't know I was an exhibitionist until a few months ago. A few weeks ago, one of the traits I felt was core to me just seemed to melt away. I decided to move my hatha yoga practice from after work to the middle of the day. Now, when everyone goes to lunch, instead of working through as I have for over 8 years, I go home. Get undressed, do some stretching, run through about a half-hour sequence, get dressed and go back to work. Then, to top it all off, I leave work somewhere between 5:30 and 6:00. Now, yes, quitting time is actually 5:00, but since I usually left at around 7:00, this change feels monumental. I still love my job. It's a great way to spend 40 or so hours a week. But, it no longer serves as an adequate description of who I am.
I could spend some time analyzing my self. Trying to define the new patterns. But, that's something else that's changed. I'm just gonna see how it turns out.
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